I am often paralyzed by the fear of making the wrong decision or not having my final product, whatever that may be at the time, be good enough – “right” enough. You see, I love to research. I want to know all of the facts, the history, the why and what is coming next. I think that is a good thing. My problem is that sometimes, I can’t decide what is best – when I have looked at enough science.

There are tons of people that each study very specific topics for their entire lives and I want to know all of it…in about a week. Once I start learning about a topic, it usually continues for much more than a week. I obsess.

I look into something, take high cholesterol treatments and causes for example. For a lot of people, a quick Google search and results from WebMD or a similar site is enough. Nope, not for me. It is a starting point that continues in different directions as I start wanting more. Alternative treatments. HDL and LDL. Is high cholesterol actually bad? Why or why not? Why are statins bad? Do they even do anything? Why are they still prescribed? Why don’t doctors know all of this “stuff” about statins? Do most people even know what they are taking? For each of these, I definitely am not satisfied with one side, or even one site for each side. I want all of the different perspectives possible.

And then when you factor in that we, as people are always learning more and that the science is never “settled,’ how am I supposed to stop? [About science not being settled: The Earth is flat -> the Earth is round. No Pluto -> Pluto is a planet -> Pluto is not a planet -> Is Pluto a planet? Cigarettes are good for you -> Cigarettes are definitely terrible for you.

Somewhere down the rabbit hole, I get to a point where I am comfortable with what I have learned and I get the gist of the information for myself but I am not as comfortable sharing that with someone else. What if I got something wrong? A detail, a word? What if I can’t answer their questions? What if I missed something? What if they think I’m dumb because I don’t have such and such certification/license/degree? What if they don’t want to hear it because it challenges what they thought they knew? What if they make fun of me? These are things that paralyze me. I don’t share information, good information, because these things paralyze me.

So now, I have all of this information in my head that I mostly don’t share. Sometimes it is frustrating to see people making uninformed decisions when I know information that could help. Sometimes a topic comes up in conversation that I know about, I say something helpful and feel good about it. And sometimes, I get looks like I have 4 heads.

I try to pray about it. The words that God would have me speak…or not. The truths that I should talk about and those that I should leave alone. Maybe God wants some truths to come to light at a different time. I don’t know His plan (as much as I want to, at times.) I can, and will, keep praying for His guidance and that He will give me the right words to speak at the right time.

This blog is my challenge to share with those who want information and get to a point with each topic where I can confidently share with all of you. That means no researching forever. It means stepping out of my comfort zone.

Are there topics that you struggle with sharing when you feel you should? Do you overshare? Let me know in the comments below.